Robin Hood

While I was rummaging through a bargain bin one day looking for a Jack Benny DVD, I stumbled upon a DVD for the first season of a British television version of Robin Hood from the 1950s. At $5, it was easy to take a chance on it.

We loved it. The Sheriff of Nottingham is one of the all-time great villains. Robin and Maid Marian have some real spark. The Sheriff likes her, too. She gets away with all sorts of stuff because he is blinded by his attraction.

Plus, the plotting is great. You pick up some history in a painless way. And it amuses us that Little John has to wear lifts to make him noticeably taller than Robin.

We have since acquired Season 2 and Season 3. The only disappointment has been that they switched Maid Marian actresses between Season 2 and Season 3, and the new one clearly does not have the same spark with Robin or the Sheriff of Notthingham.

I say all this to provide context for Sparkle Girl's comment when she saw a sticker on a car that said, "Proud Parent of a Soldier."

"Maybe we should get a sticker," she said, "that says, 'Proud Parent of an Outlaw.'"

Sparkle Girl's Socks

The other day, Sparkle Girl was sitting at the kitchen table while Garnet and I were talking about a sensitive topic. I stopped to tell Sparkle Girl not to say anything about this to other people.

OK, she said.

As I was thinking about it later, I decided that the context of telling her not to say anything to anyone was ambiguous enough that she might think that I was encouraging her to lie.

It seemed best to clarify the point when I the time seemed right. That moment arrived the next day.

We were sitting next to each other on the couch in the living room. Before I launched into my little lecture, I asked Sparkle Girl what socks she was wearing.(She was wearing boots so I couldn't tell.)

Why, you might ask, was I interested in her socks?

Sparkle Girl's socks are one of the things I check when I pull out the Cute-O-Meter before she goes off to school. She has a good color sense and she usually picks out socks that complement some other element of her outfit.

It was the weekend so her socks hadn't come up earlier in the day, and I was curious. More particularly, I was wondering whether she was wearing her hot-pink socks.

One day a while back, it occurred to me that I had seen her wearing those hot-pink socks just the day before. When I asked, she acknowledged that she had not only worn them the day before but also the day before that, too, because she likes them so much.

Naturally, Garnet and I immediately launched into a lecture about how you can't wear socks day after day, that you need to put them in the wash.

OK, Sparkle Girl had said.

Back to the couch: She told me that she was wearing a pair of white socks. Without any prompting from me, she added that she hadn't worn them yesterday.

That made me smile.

I launched into my lecture about telling the truth. I said that, if someone asked her about the topic that Garnet and I had been discussing, she certainly should tell the truth but that it can be OK not to bring something up. I added that, sometimes, you do have to bring up stuff up even when you didn't want to.

I circled back around to highlight certain points and was just wrapping it up, when she burst out with, "All right! All right! I wore these socks the day before yesterday."

The Doofus Meter

Dear Diary,

Sometimes Kim is silly. It's a good thing.

We will be walking and Doobins will say, "Where did Doobins and Sparkle Girl go?" when we're right behind him. Kim will look around and pretend that he doesn't see us. Then we will grab hold of his shirt and he will spin really fast and we try to stay behind him.

Sometimes he will say something silly like "Rutabaga!" I never ate a rutabaga. Neither has he. Momma has never eaten a rutabaga either but she makes really good spaghetti squash. I like it with lots of butter and salt.

Kim is good at making silly faces. Sometimes he won't stop being silly and then we say he is a doofus.

I made a Doofus Meter and, when he is being really, really silly, I get out the Doofus Meter and measure his doofusness.

I like Kim even when he is being a doofus. He likes me no matter what, too.

Signed,
Sparkle Girl

A Peck of Goodness

It was the first day back after the Christmas break, and Mr. Doobins was putting on his shoes before heading off to preschool.

Garnet asked him whether he would be a good boy at school.

"Yes, Momma," he said.

"You won't hit anyone?" she said.

"No, Momma."

"You won't yell at anyone even if you're upset?"

"No, Momma. I'll get the teacher."

"You'll say, 'Yes, ma'am,' 'No, ma'am,' Yes, please,' No, thank you,' and all those other good manners you know how to use?"

"Momma!" Mr. Doobins said. "I can't be all that goodness!"

"Then just do your best, sweetie."

Chicken and Rudy

When I was a kid, I had a Lassie picture book that started out with two men on their way to work driving by Lassie resting under a tree. As soon as they passed by, Lassie got caught up in an adventure.

By the end of the afternoon, Lassie had saved the day. Exhausted, she returned to the tree and stretched out under its branches for a little rest.

As soon as she got settled, the two men drove by the other way on their way home. Thinking that she had been lounging under the tree all day, the men commented on what a soft life she had.

We, the readers, knew otherwise.

When Sparkle Girl and I started collaborating on a story the other day, I thought it would be fun to bookend the story that way.

The characters in our new story are named Chicken and Rudy. Chicken is a bird but he is not a chicken. That's just his nickname. Chicken is afraid of nothing. Another thing about Chicken is he's not interested in taking the simple approach when, with a little thought, he can come up with something challenging.

Chicken is based on Garnet's father.

Rudy is the sidekick. He is a four-legged mammal of no particular species. He's smaller than Chicken, and he's the voice of reason.

Our first story opens with Chicken and Rudy sitting on the bench in front of the country store. Mrs. Duck comes by on her way to the farmers market. All her little ducklings are trailing along behind.

She asks Chicken and Rudy whether they would be willing to watch her babies while she shops.

Be glad to, they say. As soon as she is gone, they start speculating about the best way to entertain the ducklings. Rudy suggests that they take the ducklings for a swim in that pond over yonder. Chicken, of course, is uninterested.

Instead, he gets his pick-up truck, fills the back with water and puts the ducklings in back. Then he tells Rudy to hop in, that they are going make it exciting for the ducklings by whipping the truck around a bit to get some wave action going in the back.

The business about filling up the back of the pick-up with water and driving around with young 'uns in back comes directly from Garnet's dad. He used to do this with Garnet and her friend Mandy.

When Garnet first told me this story, I was skeptical. Now that I know her dad, I believe it.

Rudy counsels against driving around with ducklings in back. To no avail.

So they're off. This goes well enough until they hit a rock sticking out of the ground. The back end of the truck pops up, creating a giant wave that sloshes the ducklings right into the top of a tree.

Chicken stops the truck, gets out, looks up and says, "What are we going to do now?"

"You're a bird," says Rudy. "Fly up and get them."

"Where's the challenge in that?" says Chicken.

Being who he is, Chicken has all sorts of tools and equipment back at his house. He may decide that the best thing to do is go get his crane. But we don't know yet. What we do know is that it's something that would horrify Mrs. Duck if she saw it.

Sparkle Girl had the brilliant idea of setting up the picture so that whatever it is happens in the background while Mrs. Duck shops at the farmers' market in the foreground. She catches something in the corner of her eye but, when she looks up, the action has passed her by.

Other stuff that we have yet to figure out will also happen. When Mrs. Duck comes to pick up the ducklings at the end of the story, Chicken and Rudy will be back sitting on the bench with the ducklings as if nothing had happened.

That's it so far.